Wanting a Better Life; My Diary

Dear me,

Today was a tough day! I had to take my baby to the hospital because he, apparently, has a hernia. :/

It makes me so so so sad when my little ones are hurting and I can not do anything about it. How I wish I could magically fix everything for them…but reality is a butt-biter…there is nothing I can do besides taking him to the doctor and try to be the most comforting mom in the world. 

Seeing the doctor today made me want to become a doctor; the fact that you get to help others every single day. It is amazing to be able to use your knowledge to make other people’s lives easier & better. One day, I hope to do just that. Sometimes, I don’t know HOW to fix the world. I keep hearing “one person at a time” or “one day at a time”, but I need more time! 


Honestly, though I think my desire to be an engineer weighs out the other options much more heavily. You see, I want to work with technology. I want to create things that can change our lives or make it better. I want to be part of the team of creators. For example, a new spaceship being built. I don’t really care to be the one who rides it first or at all; I want to be able to say “That spaceship that is launching right now, I made it.” what a dream come true! I know engineering is about more than just the pride of creating things, but I never said i disliked computers and math and physics. These things fascinate me! There is so much to learn out there about everything and i want to study it.  

Changing the subject, I have 28 subscribers now on my Youtube channel :D

I say this with immense joy because I didn’t think people would actually subscribe…I thought people would never find my channel or they would dislike it. I first started sharing my channel with my friends and family, but somehow strangers are finding it too. Which is amazing! I would love to reach out to a lot of people out there and share with them everything I can and hope I can change someone’s life or at least help them get through something tough. I definitely know what it feels like to be suffering in solitude. Nobody to talk to, nobody to cry to. Thats tough, man.

But apart from the rough life stuff, I also want to spread happiness and positive thinking. A lot of people struggle with that, I should know. But right now, I am feeling as motivated and inspired as ever! I want to become a better me and would love to have other people make the change with me. How awesome would THAT be? To be experiencing things, life changing moments,  with other girls and sharing each other’s stories (as a matter of fact, I love stories ) and just being there for each other. Maybe the dream is a little too big, but I am so ready to throw myself into my dreams. 

What to do when people Are Judging You

Hello Friends,

     Did you go to the store with your PJ’s because you were in a rush and felt like people around you were talking about you like crazy?! Or how about when you speak your mind and then people immediately change with you because they took it personal? Similar things have happened to me. Yes.

So what though? 

Who are these people for us to care?

People everywhere can be very judgmental, including ourselves. Or are you going to lie to yourself and say “I NEVER TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE OR JUDGE THEM!” If you are going to lie to yourself, just stop. Its okay, we are very imperfect, but what is not okay is the way we react to other people’s actions. 

For example, say you went to a friend’s party and she had other friends there who you did not know. They saw you and spoke to you a little bit, but then walked away from you and you heard them saying ” Geez, she thinks she’s better than everyone. I don’t know why she talks that way; is she trying to act smart?” 

What do you do?

You can either go to them and confront them & possibly start an argument or much worse,a fight. Resulting in an increased bad opinion of you




You can simply ignore it. 

I know its tough to ignore things like this. After all, they are talking about us so it makes it our business. NO! its not our business, its theirs. They are the ones who have the indecency to talk about someone behind their back like a pack of morose gossipers. You just happened to be yourself and they didn’t like it. So what does that mean? Perhaps it means that they are not satisfied with themselves. They have to put other people down if they feel like that person is better than them. They are just being competitive. 


But honestly, guys, be the bigger person! 

Learn to be confident about yourself and stand tall. Even when people are judging you. Its you who is going to live your life. I heard from Bubz beauty “negative people are like a poisonous snake. if someone offers it to you, you probably won’t take it because you know it will harm you. So think of judgements as such.” 

Its okay to let it go. 

trust me. You will feel better at the end of the day.

Friends, this was more of an intro so please feel free to check out my channel on youtube for tips on how to deal with judgmental people and more girl stuff, here is the link:



Have a great day Beautiful people & stay strong every single day. 


Ready to Start Something New


   Lately, I have been doing something I really enjoy!!! Creating youtube videos is my latest hobby. Honestly, it takes more time & effort than I initially thought, but who cares?! Its so much freakin’ fun! :)

I love recording and knowing that I am reaching others out there. However, the first video I made, I felt a bit awkward. I had no subscribers so I was like “Okay, I am not really talking to anyone…so yeah…lets do this.” It was something I was not used to, but the more & more I do it, the more I tend to enjoy and love it! 

But I am not doing this so I can show off the things I have or be a conceited girl. I created I Captivate You because I wanted to create a small community of girls who are friendly, confident and amazing! I want to talk about inner beauty and help other girls out there deal with the tough situations life throws at us. And believe me, I would know about tough situations. These last years have been soooo bad for me. And all  because of a stranger. He changed my life forever in the worst way, but Somehow I have to manage to live with it. And that is what I want to help other people do. Not only is I Captivate You going to be about makeup and beauty tips/tricks; thats just a plus in the channel. My main focus is to motivate people, help them feel and look good from the inside out. I want to make friends & be a friend. I would love to share my life with others and hope that one day, at least ONE person can tell me I did something good for them. I would love to bring happiness to others. I know I can’t fix the world (although if I could, I would), but with one person at a time, we can change hearts, minds and therefore change our surroundings…the goal is to have such a huge impact that more people will WANT to be better. 

I really hope I can do this. I hope I can meet other people who are in need of a makeover (inner/outer), some advice, life tips, a girl to talk to..a Friend….hope people like me and that I can only get better from here. 

These past few years were so sad that I distanced myself from friends..old & new. I don’t want to be that person anymore. I am so ready to take my friends back & gain more along the way. Its time for a huge change within myself and I want to share that journey with everyone else & invite them to join me. It is possible to change ourselves. I know it is. 

I was not born for nothing. I was not born to be depressed or to be stuck at home. I was born to live…nothing more, nothing less. And now I understand that the life I live is my responsibility, my choice. Some people can impact it, yes. However, will I let it ruin my life or change me completely from the girl I was before? 

Defintely  NOT ANYMORE. 


Two Super Easy Summer Makeup Looks


Hello Everyone! 

Summer is here! To add some creativity and ease to your summer makeup routine, I created these two looks. 

One is a bold look for those sexy and fun SUMMER NIGHTS…oh yeah! But you can also do this makeup look during the day. It’s definitely not a harsh look at all. 

In the other look, I turned it down a notch & decided to go for a more subtle, gentle look.


Hope you guys try these looks out and let me know which one you liked best!:)


Also, I would GREATLY appreciate if you took a few minutes to check out my channel & subscribe if you like all things Beauty & all things Girl. 


Have a really fun day, full of smiles!!!



Rachel Kylee Kwon